A Wild Heart and Brass Knuckles

On a recent trip to Washington State, I was at a farmer’s market and stumbled across a stand from The Sherwood Press with embossed postcards and letterpress signs with heartfelt and cheeky sayings. I instantly fell in love with one that said, “Show up with a wild heart and brass knuckles,” and it now lives in a prominent spot in my house. I look at it often, and am reminded about how personal, professional and business growth comes from showing up in the world with both sides of that mantra.

Showing up with a wild and open heart is not easy. Vulnerability in a world that is not great at taking care of delicate things is scary and can be painful, and we learn that lesson early in life. And so we toughen up, and our hearts harden and tame and figure out how to stay in a protective place where we don’t get hurt as often, and where the disappointment can be managed reasonably. But we lose something in the process. A wild heart is open, allowing space for curiosity, for connection, for goals and dreams, for hope and optimism, and for exploration. A wild and open heart allows us to tune in to the heartbeats of our own needs, and for tuning into the needs of and connection with others. There is much risk to be found by having a wild heart, by choosing to consciously open yourself up to feeling the feelings of life. It can be hard to make that choice, and it can be hard to stay there once chosen.

The brass knuckles, on the other hand. We’re better at those, we learn defensive strategies early. Once we learn about the difficulties of life, about inequities, about injustice, and that life isn’t fair, we put those brass knuckles on (figuratively for most of us, but this is a judgment-free zone!) to navigate through the world. Sometimes, admittedly, it can be hard for us to fight for ourselves, and we wonder if it’s worth the effort to stand up for ourselves in the world, but we know that we should fight, so we put on a bravado (sometimes it’s fake, sometimes it’s real) to make our way through a world full of thorns and setbacks—we’re always ready for a good fight. The “brass knuckles” of confidence and toughness give us an edge, a strength, and the ability to swing when we need to swing to protect ourselves and others, to take bigger risks than we would normally.

Success and growth require both mindsets working together. You can’t grow unless you open up the vulnerable parts of you or your business to expose them to the light. Ignoring what you need to do, continuing on the same path, won’t move you forward from where you are today. You’ll continue to make the same choices and the same mistakes without being vulnerable and open to introspection, exploration, and possibilities, and without truly working to understand you and others around you. And once you do the vulnerable work, you will need the toughness to make the changes you need to make, to be ruthless in the pursuit of growth, to be better than you are today. You’ll need to dive in, clearing the thorny parts, to get to the clear place to plant the new things. You will need to believe in yourself and take the uncomfortable risks and swing to protect yourself and your business and your growth.

So this week, show up with a both wild heart and brass knuckles, to become the best version of yourself—holding them both in balance can be a challenge, but you’ve got this!